The blog of photographer and musician, Kim Ayres

Spreading my seed

I’ve never been asked to guest post on someone else’s blog before, so to be approached by Restaurant Gal for my first time was a real honour. I’ve been enjoying her writings and observations for many months and love the way she draws us into her world where dramatic operas are played out - full of heroes, villains and sidekicks all vying for her emotional energy against a backdrop of chairs and tables.

After the initial ego boost and smugness however, I was suddenly overcome with self-doubt. On my own blog I can write whatever crap I want, but writing for someone else ups the pressure level. It’s like moving from masturbation to lovemaking: suddenly you have to take someone else into consideration and feelings of inadequacy can threaten to overwhelm.

Restaurant Gal has her own set of readers, very few of which overlap with this blog. What if her regular readers think, “Who’s this prat? I come to this blog to read about my favourite waitress and maître d', not the ramblings of some bearded fella with a funny accent and a girl’s name.”

However, if it works, perhaps it opens up the possibility of doing other guest posts and inviting some of my favourite bloggers to guest post here. I’m not sure why, but that idea gives me a bit of a thrill.

Keeping with the theme of her blog, I have written about my own experience of restaurants and how my attitude to them has changed over the years (

So while I extend my thanks to Restaurant Gal for devirginalising (now why isn’t that word in the dictionary?) me, do head over to her blog - - introduce yourself, and have a look around. You might just find yourself adding her to your blogroll.


PI said...

Obviously she ahas faith in you and so do I. I'll pop over but my blog roll has to be fiddled with by my friend Tom which costs money so I do it rarely. Always as soon as I have done it a blogger changes his name or retires - without fail! Sod's law!

Carole said...

I read your post on RG's site and enjoyed it a great deal. The thing I don't get--and maybe it's because you are a philosopher and you study these things--is how you know exactly how I feel. The fear of going into a restuarant for the first time, the how much to tip question...All stuff that reminded me of how I felt when I first when to a restaurant. Still I would not know how to accurately articulate such stuff. IT was a great post, however I am not sure it would be right to say, "Good job, continue spreading your seed." Something about that sounds vaguely...

I don't think I will be able to go to Restaurant Gal's site. I am already addicted to your site and I have a job, a home, a family, and all I want to do is blog. Stop the madness. How did I get caught up in this vortex?

Kitchen Bitch said...

Well done! Isn't it nice to still have the occasional 'first' in one's forties?

Kim Ayres said...

Pat - if you have to pay someone to update your blog, I'm not surprised you need to minimise the number of times you do it. If you find yourself in Scotland I'll show you how to do it yourself for free

Carole - What I understand is how I feel, but as we're all human we all recognise the feelings. Politicians, many religions and hatemongers like to focus on our differences, but we're all far more alike than they would care to admit.

When I first started blogging it was difficult to find ones I wanted to read, now I have far too many

Kitchen Bitch - absolutely! When you stop experiencing new things, the only one left is death.

El Guapo in DC said...

Just remember to tip when you come over the pond. ;-)

Kim Ayres said...

El Guapo - It's a cultural thing. In the UK it's customary to tip in restaurants and cafes, but not in bars. When I was in Canada I remember being very surprised to be expected to tip bar staff - it felt like tipping a checkout operator at the supermarket. It's a strange thing - we'll tip a cab driver, but not a bus driver. I wonder who drew up the rules about who gets tipped and who doesn't?

Mary Witzl said...

I've just read your post on RG's site myself and thought that it was wonderfully funny. My parents were great people, but complete hicks, and we never went to what you might call really fancy restaurants. The cafe at Thrifty's Drug Store was a firm favorite, as was a certain Mexican taco stand -- and that was about it. My first meal in a real restaurant doesn't bear thinking about, but your description really brought it all back. Oh, the panic. I can remember that I tried to pretend that it was all perfectly usual -- that I felt completely relaxed and nonchalant about the experience.

As for taking one's kids out to a nice restaurant, well, life's too short. We have done this very occasionally ourselves, but the embarrassment potential is so great I find that it interferes with digestion.

Kim Ayres said...

Mary - service station cafes were about the most I'd experienced until my late teens. Although I do have the vaguest of memories of when I was around 10 years old and we were away somewhere, we went to a KFC, and that was considered the height of indulgence.

We've taken our kids to restaurants from an early age so they are actually pretty well behaved.

BStrong said...

That's one brave girl.

Freakazojd said...

Haha! Still laughing at this post - I'll definitely go and check out your guest post. How exciting!

Kim Ayres said...

BStrong - she deserves a medal

Freakazojd - it was exciting and I enjoyed doing it. I think it opens up new possibilities with blogging

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