The blog of photographer and musician, Kim Ayres

I know I shouldn't have, but...

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After the disappointment of yesterday, I gorged myself on far too much chocolate last night.

And felt considerably better for it.

Today I'm just generally a bit pissed off, rather than feeling that extreme void in chest, like my heart's been ripped out and dropped into the endless pit of despair.



For anyone out there who still thinks self medicating with food is just an excuse to be greedy, this is the bit you utterly fail to understand - chocolate works - at least temporarily.

Faced with the choice between emotional anguish, and a large bar of chocolate, there really isn't much competition. In that state you will completely ignore anyone saying, "Well, if you don't want to be overweight, just stop eating so much"

Unless they're covered in chocolate, that is.

In which case you'll be charged with cannibalism.
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22 comments

cinderkeys said...

Hey there. New to this site, so ... when doctors told you that you have chronic fatigue syndrome, what was the basis for the diagnosis? If you have the real deal (the more respectable name for which is myalgic encephalomyelitis), then I hope you find doctors who have a clue. ME involves doesn't involve just greater-than-average tiredness. It involves serious, chronic pain and post-exertional malaise -- that is, you feel horrible after ANY exertion, like, say, walking to the bathroom. CBT doesn't help the symptoms, and graded exercise therapy can make it worse.

http://www.nightingale.ca/documents/Nightingale_ME_Definition_en.pdf

On the other hand, if you're just really really really extremely tired, then you dont have ME/CFS, and you need to get a new diagnosis. One that will actually help you.

Again, new to this site, so if I've just rambled on about stuff you already know, my apologies.

Restaurant Gal said...

Oh, ugh. I am sorry. I also know you will push through. In the meantime, did you find "Best in Show"? When RG Daughter was home sick with mono for three weeks, it was the one thing that kick-started her feeling better. Laughter, you know, works wonders. And that movie makes me laugh till I cry every time I watch it. xo

Tom said...

Chocolate absolutely works. If only George W. Bush had sent Saddam a box of Ghirardelli Caramel Squares we wouldn't be in this mess.

And I'll be sure to keep my distance if I ever find myself dipped in chocolate.

Anonymous said...

If chocolate works then why not - you could far worse than that. Are you going for the 70% continental stuff or quite happy with a marathon or a bar of fruit and nut? Personally I would go for a couple of slices of marmite on toast followed by a big bowl or butterscotch angels delight but that's just me. Tonight I'll have to settle for a couple of pints and a wee tune down the pub.

Keep nibbling
Sandy

Kim Ayres said...

Cinderkeys - welcome to my ramblings and thank you for taking the time to comment.

The whole CFS ME thing is still a bit of a mystery to me. Here in the UK it is combined to be called CFS/ME, however, I've never suffered from the muscle and joint pain I know ME suffers, er, suffer.

But it appears CFS is a diagnosis by omission. If you are suffering from long term tiredness and it can't be accounted for by the usual sets of tests, it's called CFS.

I must admit I was surprised to find CFS & ME lumped together as I'd always assumed ME was more clearly recognised and diagnosed.

So being a catchall term for "We know you're tired by don't know why" means, CFS probably contains a dozen different conditions that haven't been identified yet, which is why there is no solution that works for all cases.

The problem for me so far is I suffer from a Fatigue which has been getting worse over the past couple of years. It has drastically affected my ability to work and be active, but no one has a clue why. I was hoping the Haemochromatosis diagnosis referred to in the last post was going to be the underlying cause, but it isn't.

Restaurant Gal - next time I'm in the video hire shop, I'll defnitely look it out :)

Tom - Well we all know about Swiss Chocolates, and when was the last time Switzerland tried to take over the world? Huh? Huh? I think you've made a serious point there, Tom

Sandy - Usually I'm a 70% fair trade man, but there wasn't any in the house last night, so it was a mix of crunchie, flake, chocolate buttons and anything else I could lay my hands on

Fat Lazy Guy said...

Cannibalism has never been so delicious! :D

Dang, now I'm hungry. For chocolate, that is. Not human flesh... no...

somebody's mama said...

chocolate is certainly a weakness for me.

debra said...

Dark or milk chocolate? Either one is a good thing. Take care and let me know if you need me to send you some more chocolate, ok? I'd send an assortment and you could taste test.

Kim Ayres said...

FLG - apparently it tastes just like pork.

Somebody's Mama - someone has to keep the chocolate companies in business... thank you for coming to visit :)

Debra - get thee behind me Santa...

Mary Witzl said...

Don't you get anywhere near me for the next 24 hours! I'm absolutely stuffed full of chocolate in many forms and you'd smell it on me and no doubt go all savage! You see, I've been self-medicating with chocolate too. I only do it once in a while on my mental health break days, but when I do it, I do it very well indeed.

My advice is, wallow. Milk it dry. Get yourself some of those funny movies the others have suggested (Stephen K Amos is one we've been watching recently -- greatly recommended!) and hunker down for a couple of days with them. The fetal position is great, but so are all the relaxing yoga poses (no, they aren't exercise, don't worry!). A little hot milk wouldn't hurt either, with plenty of cinammon on it. And take all the TLC your family can manage, too. I'm guessing they can keep it coming pretty well.

Kim Ayres said...

Mary - it's a friend's birthday today, so more cake. This time Maggie's making it with lots of butterscotch & cream.

Maybe I should just give in and return to the old days of 275lbs

Jupiter's Girl said...

That's right, Kim. Just surrender. Recommendations for funny movies: start with "American Vacation" (National Lampoon's), and end with "Talledega Nights". Funny and philosophical, "Stranger than Fiction", "Groundhog's Day". Just for fun - good movie - "Waking Ned Devine". That's my recommendation. Dark chocolate has anti-oxidants. That's got to be good for haemasomething.

PI said...

You are not the only one who's been a bit naughty. Yesterday I had a back tooth extracted and exhausted myself being a brave soldier and missing the kids so when I discovered a Belgian chocolate box with its bottom layer almost complete, I slowly polished it off. It seems to have had a healing effect on my socket and I had a good nights sleep and the pain spoken of in the leaflet for post extraction hasn't happened. So like Piaf 'je ne regrette rien'

savannah said...

;-) oh my, sugar, but are we all on the same chocolate cycle now? xoxox

(york peppermint patties here)

Doug Dog said...

I’m with you 110%. Chocoholics unite!

Kim Ayres said...

Jupiter's Girl - I have a definite preference for dark chocolate over milk.

Pat - good lord! And entire layer, barely touched? That's like finding the crown jewels down the back of the couch

Savannah - perppermint patties sound goooooood

Doug Dog - Absolutely Not! Don't come within a hundred yards of my chocolate or I'll set the crocodiles on you!

Conan Drumm said...

Mmmmmmmm.... c..h..o..c..o..l..a..t..e.... but beware the low when the serotonin boost drops off.

Kim Ayres said...

I know, I know, I know... *sob*

Goodmood Masala said...

I don't know why they don't dish out the stuff at hospitals and job interviews!

Kim Ayres said...

Goodmood - thre's a gap in the market there - time to start your own business :)

Goodmood Masala said...

I'd just end up eating it myself!

Kim Ayres said...

:)

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