That time of year
January is the Lost Month in terms of creativity, action and getting on with life. Instead it is the month of stress, despair, and much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
Yes, Christmas and New Year celebrations are now past, and the house returns to looking duller without the twinkly lights.
But that’s not it.
Bank accounts tend to look rather overdrawn as the cost of Christmas becomes all too apparent.
But that’s not it.
The weather is usually dull, wet, cold and grey.
But that’s not it.
Spring, sun, flowers and warmth are still many months away.
But that’s not it.
Coughs, colds, flu and a whole multitude of illnesses are flying about.
But that’s not it.
No one I know has any birthdays or other reasons to party or celebrate.
But that’s not it.
No one’s looking to have their photo taken as they are in hibernation mode, and grumpy from the lack of sunlight, excess weight, sugar withdrawal, illnesses and empty back account.
But that’s not it.
Of course none of these things exactly helps, but there is something else far worse than all these things.
Something so dominating it obscures everything else.
Something that churns the guts and suggests suicide or skipping the country as a possible avoidance strategy.
Something we swear every year we will make damn sure will be less painful in future.
Our Self Assessment Tax Returns are due NO LATER THAN JANUARY 31ST!
Every year the whole of January is lost to a combination of :
trying to find receipts, bank statements and cheque books
trying to sort receipts, bank statements and cheque books into some kind of order
trying to match receipts, bank statements and cheque books so they all tally up
trying to enter all the information into a spreadsheet
trying to make sense of the Self Assessment Tax Return forms
spending hours on the phone in queues for the Self Assessment Tax Return Helpline while all the “operators are busy”
trying to figure out how to get online and logged in to submit the Self Assessment Tax Return
trying to find a way to submit the Self Assessment Partnership Tax Return figures as Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs doesn’t supply an online submission option for this particular form.
trying to decide which figures go into which boxes once we have tracked down, paid for and downloaded a pay-for Self Assessment Partnership Tax Return that can be submitted online to Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs
trying to interpret how to submit the downloaded software so Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs recognises and accepts the figures we’ve inputted
All the while cursing, and overflowing with self-loathing, for not being more organised and leaving everything to the last minute. Again.
Of course, next year will be different…
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