The blog of photographer and musician, Kim Ayres

A different direction

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Any one of the thousand awful steps that led here could have turned in a different direction, and this point would not have been reached.

At any time, a different path could have been chosen.

We have watched each step taken, waiting for, hoping for, even trying (without success) to steer the course in a different direction.

This precipice should never have been reached.

One more step and everything will tumble so far down the chances of recovery are so unlikely they cannot be realistically considered.

We desperately, achingly, hope, while watching powerlessly the shuffle along the edge, that the next step will be in a different direction, a new direction, one of a better life.

Despite all the appalling damage already done, it is still not too late to turn in a different direction.

All we can do is watch as events unfold in slow motion.
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25 comments

~:C:~ said...

Not sure what's going on, exactly, but my thoughts are in Scotland with you.

The Lassie & Laddie said...

Oh no, this sounds very scary and heartwrenching. My thoughts are with you and your family!

savannah said...

good thoughts from across the pond, sugar. xoxox

starrlife said...

Hugs and support to you and your family.

Katie Roberts said...

I hope that slow motion is giving you and others a chance to regain your balance and find a new way through the situation, whatever it may be..... gosh I'm really worried about you all now! I trust you and Maggie and the kids are OK and just feeling the darker, harder, rougher bite of life for a short time. Sending love, light and hope your way. Kd (hugs too)

mapstew said...

You are right, it is NEVER too late!

Thinking of you all, and, i don't know how, but if I can help in any way you know where I am pal. :¬)

Eryl said...

I have heard that looking into the abyss doesn't necessarily result in falling into it. There's still hope, isn't there?

Sandy's witterings said...

It's almost exactly 7 years since I stepped off the edge of my precipice Kim. Seems the fall wasn't all that fatal after all (to everyone concerned).
Of course your precipice is different from mine and it's very difficult to see in the glare of "if onlys". Maybe you have to go and maybe you don't. I wish you all the best of luck anyway and a good bundle of bravery to do what's right.

Kim Ayres said...

~:C:~ - thank you

Lassie & laddie - thank you

Savannah - thank you

Starrlife - thank you

Katie - the slow motion is not about giving us space, it's about watching a car crash in slow motion and being powerless to do anything about it

Map - much appreciated

Eryl - according to Nietzsche the abyss gazes back... unfortunately this is not my abyss, all I can do is watch someone else walking towards it

Sandy - not my precipice - I can deal with that one - and have on too many occasions, but this isn't about me, other than being caught in the fall out

hope said...

Just know we're here and we care.

Pat said...

I know you don't believe in prayer but I do and you are getting one tonight.xox

V said...

I can only reiterate what has already been said.
Your words are the story of so many desperate situations, and beautifully written. Love, loss, self destruction, illness physical or otherwise, addiction, family...I'm sure each of us reading them remembers a time when they were true for us and someone we care for. Some stories must unfold themselves, and somewhere amongst the ashes rebuilding can begin.
Keep your hope and support reaching outwards. Hugs x

Fay's Too said...

I felt that one, Kim.
It is true on individual and universal levels. One step forward, Dude.

angryparsnip said...

As one who has been and is now living something similar to you, my thought are with you.

parsnip

Grumpy Old Ken said...

Thank you for your excellent post re BON. It helped me as I found the experience somewhat disconcerting. Plus blogging is taking up too much of my time sometimes. how do you 'young 'uns' (compared to me) find time to do several blogs?

Ron said...

Kim, rarely a day goes by that I don't think of "why am I here?" "What is my relation with the universe?"
I'm reading an excellent book right now called "The Seat of the Soul" by Gary Zukav. Are you familiar with this book. I find it very comforting. So comforting that I often go back and read over the same words. The words are like water to a man dying of thirst. Check it out when you have a chance. As always, my thoughts are with you and your family my friend.

Carole said...

Hard stuff. Whether it is you or someone you love, watching in slow motion is painful. I am so sorry.

debra said...

sending you love and light. I know that you already have courage. xo

Hindsfeet said...

honey....... : ( ......praying for a save for you friend......

Elizabeth

erika said...

I'm sorry. It must be tough to watch.

allencapoferri said...

I'm not certain I have the right words to say except that my thoughts are with you.

Jayne Martin said...

My sweet friend, my heart aches at sound of the pain in your voice.

I hope you'll pour those feelings into your photography rather than letting them fester inside you. We have no control over the experiences of others, only our own responses to them. It's not selfish to save yourself.

Big hugs...

Kim Ayres said...

Hope - thank you

Pat - thank you

V - thank you

Fay - one step at a time

Parsnip - thank you

Ken - glad the post was of use :)

Ron - I'm not familiar with it, but I'll check out the amazon reviews you emailed me

Carole - thank you

Debra - thank you

Elizabeth - thank you

Erika - thank you

Allen - thank you

Jayne - thank you

GingerGirl said...

Hope all is well.

Kim Ayres said...

So far... thank you :)

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