When someone we love dies, we are broken beyond healing.
It is not a wound that will eventually knit back together; instead we are smashed and shattered beyond repair.
The only way to move forward is to take the pieces and build something new with them. It might superficially resemble the original, but if you look closer you will see parts are missing, and other things have been created to fill the space.
We do not recover and come to terms with their loss; we build ourselves into someone who might be able to survive their absence.
Nobody ever tells you this.