“Cu*t” said Dr Maroon as I walked into Cap’n Bobs to meet him for lunch.
“F*ck!” I replied.
“No you idiot, cu*t. Look, just get rid of the asterisk.”
“This is a family friendly blog,” I said, “there are parents and grandmothers reading this. I’m not going to allow foul language here. Keep it for Blunt Cogs.”
“Blunt Cogs is what I’m talking about.”
“And you still expect me to remove the asterisk?”
“For goodness sake, Ayres, trust me on this one.” Maroon looked at me firmly with those startlingly pale blue eyes of his and I felt my suspicions wavering.
“OK, Ack, but you’d better not let me down on this one. I’m going to remove the asterisks… now!”
“Cult,” he said.
I breathed a sigh of relief before asking, “What on earth are you on about?”
He then proceeded to tell me everything I need to know about how to turn Blunt Cogs around from a minor blog, with only handful of daily visits, into a major cult phenomenon. So over the next week or so I’m going to instigate some key changes, but in the spirit of “never apologise and never explain” this will be the last time I mention it.
He also told me where the Illuminati were going wrong and how I should be raising my children, but at that point he was beginning to froth slightly at the mouth so I just nodded politely.
He did, however, appreciate that once the asterisks had been removed he could see I had in fact been referring to Fock, the creator of Fock space, which is an algebraic system used in quantum mechanics to describe quantum states with a variable or unknown number of particles.