Friday, November 13, 2009

The camera never lies...

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It is said the camera never lies. This is, of course, complete bollocks.

A far more accurate statement would be, the camera never tells the truth.

From the moment we choose to select this angle rather than that angle, use this lighting over that lighting, to include these elements instead of those elements, we have set about manipulating the final interpretation of the image.

And this is before we begin any post-production editing.

A photograph would be far more accurately described as a story than a representation of reality.

So with this in mind, I decided to explore three different narrative options in Photoshop this morning, with the following result (have the volume on if you wish to hear my dulcet tones):



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49 comments:

savannah said...

how cool are you, sugar? what a great example of photoshop techniques! xoxox

Anna van Schurman said...

I'm glad I turned up the volume. I don't do that for just anyone you know. (Too bad photoshop doesn't work on the real thing. I have a few areas I'd like photoshopped.)

PS--how easy would it be for me to use photoshop to "recondition" some photos that have been mistreated at my parents. Some are cracked and others are missing bits--like when tape pulled off a little color here and there. Better to take it to an expert?

Brave Astronaut said...

And I thought it was just Meg and Rogan who were feeling a bit green around the gills.

Great work with Photoshop. Your talents continue to amaze us.

Jayne Martin said...

That was hysterical! I just want my own personal lighting director who will follow me everywhere and make sure no overhead light ever sheds its hell on me.

samboy said...

i enjoyed that little video!

you should record audio-books, you have a very pleasant voice :) x

Jimmy Bastard said...

So you really do have the power of God then, with all this jiggery-pokery of the faces.

On screen I saw shades of James Dreyfuss, and Gary Bushell. But the elegant clipped "english" tone is straight out of a Hugh Grant filum.

Entrepreneur Chick said...

That was laugh out loud hysterical! Well done!

And you know the stuff I've been through this past year... don't I know it.(That the camera lies.) :::wink:::..

Did you mention somewhere as to how your son is doing but I missed it?

Postman said...

"So, the next time somebody tells you that the camera never lies, take the time to snigger, chuckle, or completely guffaw in their face."

Whatever that face may look like...

Excellent work on Photoshop. This is a very enlightening video.

The Pollinatrix said...

Hallelujah - I never have to tweeze again!

Very enlightening. And entertaining. You really should be getting paid for this stuff.

But don't look at me.

gayle said...

I enjoyed that.....but the one picture that looked like "you know who" :)

Carrie said...

This was brilliant! Very well done. :)

litzi said...

LOL! There are quite a number of Hollywood celebs that would benefit from your talents…

Pat said...

Lovely to hear your voice again. Call me stick-in-the-mud but I prefer you - warts and all - untouched by human hand.

Kim Ayres said...

Savannah - thank you :)

Anna VS - Photoshop is a great programme for reconditioning old photos - I've done it several times myself. But it all depends how familiar you are with the programme - it can take a while to learn if you're starting from scratch.

Brave Astronuat - no matter how bad they feel, I can make them look worse...

Jayne - most hollywood stars and supermodels have their own photoshop specialists who deal with all their images befoe they are released to the public

Samboy - I've done a couple of audio blogs over on the Storyteller's Blog - see sidebar under "Where else to find me"

Jimmy - Hugh Grant? My accent's about as close to his as yours is to Scotty from Star Trek!

Entrepreneur Chick - Everyone's basically on the mend, though at different rates. I'm hopeful the kids will be back to school on Monday :)

Postman - thank you :)

Pollinatrix - I'll be setting up a paypal account shortly :)

Gayle - forgive me for being slow off the mark, but I'm not sure which "you know who" you mean

Carrie - thank you :)

Litzi - well if you know any that you can point my way...

Pat - being an ex-model, you know how much appearance is manipulated to create an effect. And that's fine - we can have fun with it. But perish the thought we ever felt it was important :)

Ron Tipton said...

Fascinating! You did it again Kim. By the way, was my picture the inspiration for this post? Or did you think to do the devil version of me afterwards?

Another "by the way." You voice......yet another talent. You could easily be an announcer. Have you ever looked into that possibility? You have a refreshingly different and interesting voice. Not at all as I imagined it to be. You are a fascinating man.

Ron Tipton said...

Someday I'm going to tell my friends, "I knew Kim Ayers before he became famous."

Kim Ayres said...

Ron - someday you're going to have to learn how to spell Ayres...

As for the post, I was actually inspired after I found another tool in Photoshop I'd overlooked and it set me off on a chain of thoughts culminating in this video. The image I did for you was independent of that - I just like playing with images :)

And if I don't sound as you expected, I guess you haven't watched any of the other video's I've done (see the video tag in the "Find your favourite topics" section on the sidebar) :)

debra said...

Gotta love that photoshop. Great video, Kim.

mapstew said...

What fun!

Hope all the family are in recovery mode. And the plumbing! Have a good weekend. :¬)

Long dark hair, blue eyes said...

love it! you are the King of post-production fun.

starrlife said...

Oh my God- that was so funny and incredible and interesting! How did you do all of that? You do have a very nice voice!

Megan said...

I have one word for you, "Bravo!"

Patrick said...

That's cool!=D

erika said...

Yeah yeah I agree with everybody about the video being cool and all but how AWESOME is that ACCENT :) :) :) I would be happy to listen to you reading the phone book :)

Kim Ayres said...

Debra - thank you :)

Mapstew - it is such a relief to be able to flush the toilet. Fortunately everyone seems to be on the mend now.

Long Dark Hair - thank you :)

Starrlife - with a voice like mine I could play bad guys in American movies... ;)

Megan - Gracias :)

Patrick - terima kasih :)

Erika - if you check the Audio and Video tags under the "Find your favourite topics" header on my sidebar, you can hear more of my voice. So what is your accent like? Is there a Hungarian edge? You'll have to post an audio or video blog at some point :)

bonequinhoda bic said...

Kim this was really,really good.
I really enjoyed this.
You´re a Photoshop wizard and a really funny guy as well.
Be cool :)

Rachel Fox said...

Brilliant and very enjoyable to watch. I'd quite like to see a version to music with the changes going in time to the beat or something!
x

Falak said...

As usual .... Genius!

Katie Roberts said...

Thanks for the fun Kim :)
Beautiful voice, I agree. It seems your talents are many...

I must admit I heard a little of your voice in an earlier post when I fist started here...Brambles? It may be one of the reasons I stayed. I agree with you erika.

Interesting about our voices, how would it be to hear them all? What a variety of accents. I think mine's a bit more cultured and European then your average Australian. But its probably just crass and harsh to everyone else...

Oh and my laugh sounds like a strangled chicken!

Thanks for the chuckle.

RainyWest said...

Ha yes now that was very groovy! Pure entertaiment. Thanks!

hope said...

I don't know whether to give you a standing ovation or bow at your feet. Soon as I stop giggling at all of your Steven Spielberg movie drama. :)

Oh, and I enjoy your voice. Don't let Photoshop near it, okay? :)

Charlie said...

I think your video was great proof of your statement that the camera does in fact lie. Philosophically, it had to be ten times more fun than using truth tables for proof.

Fay's Too said...

Well, for cryin' in a bucket!!! Now I know why I always like a stranger in my photos. Someone's been uglying me up all this time.
Bahstads!

erika said...

Yes, I do have a faint unidentifiable accent, but it's not nearly as cool as yours :) Thanks for the tip on the audio bar!

Annie said...

Superb Kim! Excellent. You should post this on the corner!!

one question though.. what tool do you use for slimming the face down and widening eyes? Liquify?

Annie

St Jude said...

Oh I have to say that photoshop is my very, very best friend. :0}

Kim Ayres said...

bonequinhoda bic - thank you :)

Rachel - that would start pushing my video editing skills a bit. Perhaps a future project :)

Falak - as usual? Under pressure to maintain a high standard now then...

Katie - I have no intention of reading phonebooks... I'd love to hear more voices. When I set up the Storytellers Blog (see link on sidebar under "other places to find me"), one of the things I loved was hearing the variations in voices and accents. A strangled chicken sounds intriguing - you'll have to record it and put it online :)

RainyWest - thank you :)

Hope - you could sell all your possessions and send me the money and I'll start up a cult of people to worship me...

Charlie - the next thing to disprove will be the picture is worth a 1000 words...

Fay's too - I think that's an incredibly common experience...

Erika - believe me, my accent does not sound cool in Scotland. However, with a hint of Hungarian, I would imagine yours sounds wonderful. Put up an audio blog as soon as you can :)

Annie - well spotted that person! Yes, Liquify is such a cool tool. And despite using Photoshop for years, I've only recently discovered what it can do!

St Jude - who needs Gok Wan? :)

Annie said...

I've never used the liquify tool yet, although I do know it exists.. I'm scared of it LOL. must give it a try.

Kim Ayres said...

Annie - Just type in "liquify photoshop tutorial" into YouTube and you'll find loads on there

Mary Witzl said...

I go along with what Jayne Martin says. A personal lighting director to keep overhead light off me is a great idea. Or failing that, a photographer to take many dozens of shots in all conceivable permutations of lighting, finally coming up with a shot that makes me look like a good version of myself. (Say, I've already managed that, haven't I? How lucky I am!)

karatemom said...

that was awesome !!

Chocolatesa said...

I have to watch this once I'm home.

ADRIAN said...

Was a touch short of internet when I saw this, great bit of work!! You should run courses and become a letcher.......Sorry lecture!

cannwin said...

love your dulcet tones.

Kim Ayres said...

Mary - it's just a shame we never get to see it on your website :)

karatemom - thank you :)

Chocolatesa - hope you enjoy it :)

Adrian - I'll letcher or lecture for the right price...

Cannwin - why thank you :)

Eric Harris Robinson said...

I find photoshop so complicated to use. You, on the other hand, are a genius!

Kim Ayres said...

Eric - genius I'm not - just well practiced :)

Goodmood Masala said...

Love it!!!

Kim Ayres said...

Goodmood Masala - thank you :)