The blog of photographer and musician, Kim Ayres

Who, why, what

Who am I?
Why am I here?
And what the fuck am I supposed to be doing with my life?

Sorry about that – just another midlife reality attack.


Justin said...

Living it to answer the third question? The other two you'll have to figure out yourself.

Anonymous said...

punctuation;s a bit off today!

Anonymous said...

The answer to life, the universe and everything is 42.

Anonymous said...

Should we really answer that, or is it rhetorical? What if I told you the answers, according to my perceptions? Who, why, and what are supposedly 'because'.

(Like I know...)

Such Angst. I have had those moments too. It is the mind of a worrier. I mean warrior. The mind of a warrior.

I re commentd reading the "Warrior of Light" by Paulo Coelho. I like his writing. It is easy to digest and won't take much time from your own writing.

Anonymous said...

The word "recommend" didn't come out too good. I am typing without my specs on.

Anonymous said...

I am sure Jade Goody is asking the same questions? ;) Not that I would ever dare compare you to her, Kim.

By the way, have you thought about a career in exotic dancing?

Kim Ayres said...

Justin - ha!

Kats - so I've heard

JG - While I'd love an answer that actually made sense to me, I don't expect one. It's more of a scream in the dark.

El Branden - I think everyone else is asking that about Jade Goody. Not sure if she has the capacity to ask the questions herself.

Which is quite enviable in some ways.

Exotic dancing... hmmm...

Open Grove Claudia said...

HEY! Those are MY mid-life crisis questions! You can't steal them.

Just to cheer you... I taged you with "6 weird things about me".

Kim Ayres said...

Claudia - Done that one before - click here for more details.

If you're feeling really ambitious, then you could check out the 101 things about me. I think there's a few oddities in there

Pendullum said...

And to think that you just got tagged by Open Grove Claudia as well....

quinn said...

Hello my friend
...(HUGS)...Some times going through the daily routines cover over our true desire to know the answers to those same questions.

Will any of us really know the answers for ourselves?

I hope you have some moments today that help you find some of the things you seek.

Anonymous said...

Funny thats how I feel every Sunday morning when I wake up. I usually start with How the fuck did I get here? though.

Anonymous said...

Can I offer you a Mentos?
If you want to chat a bit, please email me.

Anonymous said...

Hey, are you listening to the thoughts in my head?????

Anonymous said...

I feel you man. Well, not literally. It's just in those times I like to pretend I'm a gangster rapper.

Kim Ayres said...

Pendullum - I'll be looking to see what you write. As I said in my reply to Claudia above though, I've done this one before

Quinn - Thanks :)

Birdwatcher - you've got to cut back on your Saturday night drinking then

BStrong - Is Mentos a locally distilled spirit? I might be in touch in the next few days

Rebecca - ah! So their yours! Well you can take them back anytime you want - they don't seem to be doing me much good ;)

FLG - How can I have reached 40 years old and never pretended to be a Gangster Rapper? Maybe this is what's missing from my life...

fatmammycat said...

How strange kim! That's is just what I"m feeling. Good to know I'm ot the only one.

PI said...

It's January Kim, and the 23rd is the worst and then it starts to get better. It's comforting to know we all have these moments - if we have a brain - and this too will pass.

Anonymous said...

No. It's actually a breath mint (Candy). I think the ale might be in order though.

Hope things are better today.

quinn said...

HI kim...I wanted to add not be too hard on yourself for the way you were feeling when you posted this on Monday January 22...I was listening to the television and apparently this day has been scientifically proven to be the one day of the year that is THE most depressing day for people.

They say there are many reasons for the depression, or bad days. From the holidays being over, to the bills all coming in and needing to be paid, to people giving up on new resolutions and being unhappy over it. All kinds of reasons.

That might also be why many of your comments that day said they were all feeling in a similar way.

So, look at it this way buddy.....

It basically means you ARE COMPLETELY NORMAL.....

have a good day my friend..

Anonymous said...

They say that helping others less fortunate than one's self gives meaning to ones life. With that in mind would you be kind enough to take another look at my blog as it seems to have changed in appearance and I don't know how to get it back to the way I had it. I'm guessing I did something I shouldn't have. This is what happens when I try and leave the kitchen.

Also, do these Why? What? questions contain hidden asumptions of a higher being with a secret agenda for us? If we stop asking them maybe we can create our own purpose.

Anonymous said...

Ignore the 'I need help' aspect of my last (first really) comment as I managed to work it out, though I'm not quite sure how.

Also, I've been meaning to tell you that I told your story for my storytelling exam. I love that story!

Anonymous said...

i have no answers to anything, i mostly walk through life clueless but fake like i know whats going on.


Anonymous said...

Reality is all in the mind, Kim. Don't sweat the small stuff. Here is my advice:

1)Eat more green vegetables.
2)Drink beer.

Result - you'll live longer due to the health-giving effects of the vegetables (thereby postponing your midlife crisis), and be too drunk to worry about anything when you eventually get there.

Hope this helps

Stella said...

You too Kim? Sigh.....sorry I can't help, don't know the answers myself. Yep January is the most depressing month in the calendar. And I am surrounded by overexcited boys - No. 1 son buying new car (well new to him) and hubby buying new bike (motorbike not pushbike - now THAT'S a midlife crisis!) - delivery of both expected this Saturday, sigh, boys and their toys - they're NOT helping!

Kim Ayres said...

FMC - It's looking to be a part of the human condition.

Pat - In the past, I have tended to find it gets easier after the clocks go forward towards the end of March. Unfortunately, that seems a long way away.

BStrong - ah, that would be like the Mintoes you get here in the UK then!

Quinn - Ye-es, this is one of the aspects I find disturbing. If this is normal (and it's certainly not uncommon, judging by several of the responses here), then there's something seriously screwed up with our programming - or our understanding of our programming.

Kitchen Bitch - Welcome to my ramblings! I'm pleased to se you've got your blog together, and that you managed to fix it before I could respond :)

You're quite right about the hidden assumption - can't get anything past a final year philosophy student. At least one of my internal conflicts is to do with the fact that I am an athiest, yet brought up with the idea that somehow the world should make sense. If I ever find out that there is a God, my first act will be to kick Him very hard in the balls.

Oh, and I'm really chuffed you love the story - that does make me feel good :)

Mollymcmo - I think we all do that, but assume everyone else knows what's going on, which makes us feel even more isolated.

Is this your first time here, in which case, welcome! (if not, then welcome back :)) Or have we passed on another blog?

Dr McCrumble - I'm doing the vegetable thing, but more than one beer and my head hurts too much the following day. But I appreciate the sentiment

Stella - A motorbike is definitely a midlife crisis thing. It it wasn't for a bad experience when I was 14, which scared the shit out of me, I can see how I'd be tempted to get one.

Attila The Mom said...

1. Why, I think you're Kim Ayres! Unless you have multiple personalities and you woke up in front of your computer screen as Napolean or something.

2. Uh, if you don't know, I certainly don't either!

3. Whenever I'm faced with that question, I either get shitfaced or eat chocolate. Your mileage might vary. ;-)

Attila The Mom said...

Uh, you didn't like wake up today with the urge to sniff butts, did you?

Then I'd feel really guilty.

Anonymous said...

Who: you are Kim, a kindly gentleman with a lady's name.

Why and what: Essentially the same question. I suggest you create a poll to allow your readers to vote what you should do with your life.

Kim Ayres said...

Attila - no, but I have started wagging my tale and getting excited everytime I think my wife is going to take me out for a walk

Kav - I laughed so hard when I read your suggestion of a poll. I'm going to have to give that some serious consideration

Anonymous said...

Reality bites at times!

Dr Maroon said...

I would have thought it was obvious by now.
Sheesh, you philosophers.

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