tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post112868052031677119..comments2024-01-11T18:39:50.665+00:00Comments on Painting With Shadows: Father and SonKim Ayreshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02656677501116622953noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1141698337614192122006-03-07T02:25:00.000+00:002006-03-07T02:25:00.000+00:00Too often (most often), male issues take a back se...Too often (most often), male issues take a back seat to the female. A way, way back seat.<BR/><BR/>This subject, of course, is one of them, and you have read my essay about my father, the man who never was.<BR/><BR/>Another is male child molestation (other than headline), incest, rape, and abuse. I was amazed, in a not good way, when men would open up and talk about these horrors in my mens' group in drug treatment.<BR/><BR/>I had a female "professor", however, who sniffed at the notion that these things occur.<BR/><BR/>I am off the subject, but thank you for referring me to this essay. You are a learned, thoughtful man.Charliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00722567671925063706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1136883127807580632006-01-10T08:52:00.000+00:002006-01-10T08:52:00.000+00:00forgot to sign off mamma miaforgot to sign off <BR/> <BR/>mamma miaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1136804769824003212006-01-09T11:06:00.000+00:002006-01-09T11:06:00.000+00:00Anonymous - I would prefer you sign with some kind...Anonymous - I would prefer you sign with some kind of name. I allow the anonymous function on this blog so that some of my less technically literate friends can leave comments, but I always ask that they at least leave a name so that I know who it's from. If you will not give me the courtesy of a name, then why should I give you the courtesy of an answer?<BR/><BR/>However, it is an interesting comment so I will give it some thought and perhaps write something about it.Kim Ayreshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02656677501116622953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1136759109890203792006-01-08T22:25:00.000+00:002006-01-08T22:25:00.000+00:00what of the fathers who want to parent but are den...what of the fathers who want to parent but are denied. does the child suffer from the absence of this bond and hopefully positive experience. who does have the right to deny the child of his father especially when the father wants this roleAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1129020713969874102005-10-11T09:51:00.000+01:002005-10-11T09:51:00.000+01:00Thank you for your comment Lord Lessismore.I have ...Thank you for your comment Lord Lessismore.<BR/><BR/>I have also found it frightening just how much we fallback into a default discipline reaction to our children when we first become fathers. Under stress we end up reacting the only way we know how - the way our parents reacted to us when we made them angry. <BR/><BR/>Pretty soon this becomes habit and unless we catch ourselves and make the conscious effort to change, we can end up continuing the cycle.<BR/><BR/>I'm not on any commission for the book Manhood, although maybe I should look into that ;) But if you enjoy it, you'll probably get a lot out of another of Steve Biddulph's books, "Raising Boys"Kim Ayreshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02656677501116622953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1128701280345983502005-10-07T17:08:00.000+01:002005-10-07T17:08:00.000+01:00BStrong - thank you for your long, but thoughtful ...<B>BStrong</B> - thank you for your long, but thoughtful comment. By the sound of it I'm sure the relationship with your father would have been in that 10%. Too often there are people in our lives who, only once it's too late, do we only realise that we really wanted to know more about them. I am glad you managed to enjoy the time you did have with him.<BR/><BR/><B>Siddharth</B> - thank you for your comments. I have been to your site and left a comment. I realise that there is much that I could not follow because of my lack of cultural references to Indian life, politics and cricket. However, there was still much to be enjoyed and I shall be back :)Kim Ayreshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02656677501116622953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15322620.post-1128694995943618742005-10-07T15:23:00.000+01:002005-10-07T15:23:00.000+01:00ur posts are so introspective and leave a lot of f...ur posts are so introspective and leave a lot of food for thought.u heard the song father and son.luckily i have a solid relationship with my dad.even at 23 i do very few things which my old man does not know abt!<BR/><BR/>i welcome u 2 visit my blog if ur interested!Siddharthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04362492046378241845noreply@blogger.com