Wednesday, May 06, 2015

Election Shock - Redux

As the country goes to the polls tomorrow, I went back through my blog to discover what I'd written about the last election, 5 years ago.

I came across this and realised we could be in for repeat reaction...

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In a massive surprise, the population woke up this morning to discover politicians had been elected to govern the UK.

People have been seen shuffling aimlessly about the streets, wearing pyjamas and dressing gowns and clutching cups of tea, with looks of shock and disbelief on their faces.

"I think we've all been duped," said Castle Douglas man, Kim Ayres. "Of course, when you think about it, we should have seen it coming. But we didn't. Politicians..." At this point he gave an involuntary shudder.

When asked who he thought we'd all been voting for, a look of stark confusion spread across his face. "I dunno really. Real people, I think. I mean, you know, people with feelings. People who care about more than just themselves. Personally I was hoping that nice woman in the post office would get in. She always gives me a warm smile and helps me work out the best way to send a parcel."

At this point our attention was drawn to the upper window as Mrs Ayres, a local mixed media and textile artist, was seen leaning out screaming, "Bastards! Politician scum!" A small cheer went up from a group of OAPS on the other side of the road.

Scenes like this are being echoed across the country as it is slowly dawning on the population of the UK that it could be years before they get another chance oust politicians once and for all.

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Think carefully how you vote, folks, or we will be trapped in a never-ending cycle - doomed to repeat this scenario every 5 years for all eternity...

6 comments:

Carole said...

You are brave to make any comment on elections. Even if the comments are funny. Some people get pretty fractious with political commentary. Of course Scotland could be gentler and kinder in their civil discourse.

Theanne Crossett said...

Hooray for Mrs. Ayres...hope she did the same this time round :)

The horror is not that there are politicians but that they run our countries.

Hindsfeet said...

....at least your people know enough to be upset about it, Kim.....at least they are awake enough to be incensed about things worth being incensed about......

....on this side of the pond, the constituents could be set on fire and forget about it five minutes later....so gorked are we on "panem et circenses".......

God help us.

Kim Ayres said...

Carole - in this case I've not actually mentioned one side or the other, so it can be read by anyone. However, if anyone wishes to explore the blog, I think my political leanings won't be too hard to discover :)

Theanne - part of the humour of this piece to me, is that Mrs Ayres wouldn't conduct herself in that manner in a thousand years :)

Liz - part of the problem with a 2 party system, is how to do a protest vote. Traditionally in the UK, the main parties were the Converatives - a right-of-centre party - and Labour - a left-of-centre party. Then there were the Liberal Democrats, who were more or less in the middle.

The Lib Dems were largely made up of people who didn't like either of the main parties, but didn't want to not vote.

Over the past years, however, Labour has moved a long way to the right. And in the election 5 years ago, the Lib Dems went into coalition with the Conservatives. Unfortunately, once in power, they broke various election promises and ruined their credibility. At the same time, by tying themselves so closely to the Conservatives, they undermined themselves as a protest vote.

So in the election last week, the Lib Vote catastrophically collapsed, leaving them with very few seats. The Conservatives ended up with an overall majority.

In essence the problem for those on the left, was they were unhappy with the shift to the right of Labour, and didn't trust the Lib Dems as a protest vote, so enough of them stayed at home and didn't vote.

In Scotland, where there is a left-of-centre alternative in the SNP (Scottish National Party), the SNP swept the board and gained 56 out of the 59 available seats. Last time they had 6 of the 59, which shows you just how strong the swing was.

In Scotland the turnout was over 71%, whereas in England it was only about 65% - the 2nd lowest turnout in 70 years.

So it's not so much that the Conservatives won the campaign, as Labour lost it.

Hindsfeet said...

what a world, huh, Kim? ...when did it all get so convoluted and complicated....maybe it has always been thus.......all the "ignore the men behind the curtain" smoke and mirrors, bells and whistles.........

...ruby slippers anyone?

be well, my friend.....hope you are, you and yours......

Liz ~*

Kim Ayres said...

Liz - it's always been this way. It's like the Mark Twain comment from over a century ago - "Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason"