Father’s Day didn’t exist in our house when I was a child. Maybe it was around and my family didn’t buy into it, or maybe it’s a more recent retail opportunity. However you can be certain I exploit it for all it’s worth.
Yes, it’s Father’s Day on Sunday and don’t forget it kids. If you want to be sure I’ll still love you until my birthday- your next opportunity to show your love and devotion in 4 months time – you’d better do something to make me feel good about being a Dad.
Mind you, I no longer wear ties – not that I would ever have worn one with Homer Simpson on it anyway – and I prefer my socks plain. I didn’t like 80’s music back in the 80s and it certainly hasn’t improved with age so don’t even think about getting me any of those “Sounds of the New Romantics” CDs with “Don’t forget Father’s Day on the 15th June” stickers on. And a pack of blank DVDs – how dull and unimaginative. What do you mean your pocket money won’t stretch to the box set of “Dexter” Season One?
Yes, I did see the local beauty salon had a Father’s Day sticker in the window, next to some photos of rather unmasculine looking metrosexuals, but if you think for a single moment I would countenance the idea of a back, sac ‘n’ crack wax, then you need your head examined.
But wait, what’s this? Hand made cards from my children and grandchildren? Fond wishes and incredibly warm words from my stepchildren?
No, no, I’ve just got something in my eye, I’ll be fine in a moment…
Who’s the daddy!
Wot? No cake?