The blog of photographer and musician, Kim Ayres

What’s On TV?

Like many middle-aged men, set in their ways and attempting to exercise minute forms of control over the universe, I like to sit down with the TV guide each week and circle my choices with a red felt pen. As my father before me, I too refuse to let my son circle his programmes in biro until I have placed my mark on the forthcoming TV schedules, thereby clearly stating my position as alpha male in the house.

Maggie doesn’t care much for television, and where I would happily invest in a 50-inch plasma screen if I had the money, she feels a 15-inch portable takes up quite enough space as it is and in an ideal world we wouldn’t have a telly at all. The Antiques Roadshow and Masterchef are the only programmes she insists on watching, although she is partial to the occasional bit of The Vicar of Dibley. Beyond that, however, I’m allowed to hold dominion over the TV, apart from when the kids get in from school, that is.

After breakfast this morning, Maggie was casually glancing through the Radio Times when, just as I was about to make a breakthrough in a “Diabolically Hard” puzzle in my “Extreme Sudoku” book, her hand slammed suddenly and purposefully, hard down on the paper as she uttered “No, No, No!”

“What is it, oh sweetness of my life?” I asked.

She turned and fixed me with a hard stare. “We are not watching ‘Strictly Lady Sumo’ tomorrow night!”

*cough*

I can’t imagine how it got circled. Meg must have been randomly scribbling in the TV guide again…

23 comments

cabronsito said...

off topic:
Hi Kim!
Asking for permission again.
I put a link to your site on my new project (home--->English---->Weblogs). Is that allright with you?

I´m trying to build a large DS-related link collection (English, Spanish and German).
Hand-made and with love.
Because today there are soooo many pages, a lot of them wonderful pages, but nobody finds them.

If you like the idea and want to help; please mention that the page exists. I need the people to find ME because I can´t ask everybody for permission like I´m doing right now. And there are still many, many pages I don´t even know.

regards
Martin

Kim Ayres said...

Cabronsito - I don't mind you linking to my site, in fact I don't think anyone will object. If people have created blogs or websites then they are in the public domain. You don't have to ask permission to link to them.

If you've not seen it already, then you might find this link - http://giftsds.segullah.org/down_syndrome_links.htm useful as it it full of links to sites that are DS-related.

Meanwhile I'll certainly link to your new site

Tara Marie said...

lol!!!!

Thinking of you and yours!

Dr Maroon said...

What channel's it on?

Anonymous said...

lol. Can I get that program in the States? I will look forward to the day where they have a "Strictly Lady Sumo" marathon, on trampolines of course.

If you wait a couple of years that 50 inch plasma will probably find itself on the "Antiques Roadshow".

Kim Ayres said...

Tara Marie - thanks :)

Dr Maroon & BStrong - Channel 4:
http://www.channel4.com/culture/microsites/S/strictly_lady_sumo/

Anonymous said...

Kim - You had to blow it by posting a link. Not quite the picture I had in my head.

quinn said...

HAHAHA.... that is so funny!!! I am thinking that may have been your son circling that one...hahaha...

My hubby totally wants a 50 inch plasma screen but It would primarily be for viewing hockey and all things sci-fi....I do mean all !!! ( puke)...

As for me ...I can watch poker for hours, I love to play poker but when I can't watching is good...and I also really enjoy antiques roadshow also..we watch the european one as well as the american and now we have a canadian one too....I love to see what people have. etc..

Anonymous said...

Ok, strict lady sumos might actually tempt me to get cable again...

Anonymous said...

What is it with t.v. and males? I'm the only male in the house, and the t.v. is like my personal play thing. Sure, I let the rest of my family watch the occasional show of their choice, but otherwise it's like I'm the director. It's crazy. Oh, but I'm with your wife on Masterchef. I love that show.

Strictly Lady Sumo does sound interesting, though :D

Anonymous said...

Lady Sumo?! Really? I have this really weird picture popping in my head... yikes!

BTW, are they called ladies because when you're this big people call you "lady"?

Anonymous said...

Wow, it's real! I thought you were joking.

Anonymous said...

Would that be on Channel 42 lol

Anonymous said...

Excellent! It reminded me of the time that Mrs B discovered that Google has a search history. She posed one or two awkward questions. I laughted it off with "I was just testing the firewall dear."

I must admit I'm with Maggie on this one. As long as I have radio 4 I'm happy.

Anonymous said...

Your household sounds a bit like mine. I'm with Maggie. My husband went out and bought an LCD tv despite my protests, but has never gotten over his 50' in. plasma lust. We have a tv in the three bedrooms of my house, in the living room, and in the shed where Michael sits and smokes his fool head off.
I rarely turn any of them on, unless of course it's 2 in the afternoon. I've been watching the Guiding Light off and on since 1977. 20 minutes of it, every third week, gets me caught up. Other than that, what would the world be like without Comedy Central. Every now and again, one sees a Sumo wrestler on that channel.

restaurant gal said...

Mr. Restaurant Gal and his big-screen TV are banished to the chilly basement, where he can watch all golf all the time, or periodic bizarre sporting events on ESPN 1,026. I, on the other hand, have my petite-screen perched in our living room, next to the fireplace, where I watch the news, read the paper, and kick back in cozy comfort. I am happy to let Mr. Restaurant Gal have "control" over his TV. :) --The Gal

PI said...

I'm with Meg on this.

quinn said...

hmmm i dunno I was re thinking this totally lady sumo wrestling thing...sumo wrestlers are great big rather chubby fellows in what basically resembles a diaper..bouncing off eachother....I dunno..but just because it will be women...I don't think the rest paints an entirely flattering view. LMAO!!!!

Kim Ayres said...

BStrong - The pictures in the head are always so much better, aren't they.

Quinn - I only really want it to watch DVDs on. We don't have cable or satellite, in fact we can't even get Channel 5 in this area, but I do like the big screen experience when watching movies.

Asher - welcome back - long time, no comment - glad to seee you posting again :)

FLG - It's a control thing. I think if you follow this link, it will explain a great deal.

Stinkypaw - I have no idea - could be a cultural thing

Kate - every bit of it is true. In fact I made notes in the margin of my sudoku book so I could write it up afterwards.

Kats - I can see you're going to try and work that number into every comment

Birdwatcher - what a great answer. Wish I'd thought of that...

Jupiter's Girl - Just the one TV in this house but then we only have the 4 channels to chose from anyway.

Restaurant gal - I've never heard of ESPN 1,026. Still, a big TV in the basement sounds good!

Pat :)

Quinn - well it's always an alternative course to take if the "Drop 2 pants sizes" and "MILF" diets don't stick.

fatmammycat said...

KIm! I just wanted to say I was flicking through the tv earlier and I saw Lady Sumos. I was THIS close to watching it. This close. but then I ran off.
The power of suggestion is awesome.

Anonymous said...

i thought you were kidding too till i checked out the link, wow!

m

Annie said...

We have a 50" plasma and hundreds of channels, but there is still usually nothing worth watching.

Kim Ayres said...

FMC - I'm impressed you managed to pull yourself away from it. I don't think I'd have managed.

MollyMcMo - when reality is so bizzare, there's often little need for making things up.

Annie - welcome to my ramblings, and thank you for taking the time to comment!

As I mentioned above, we only get 4 channels, but I can imagine getting hooked on the Sci-Fi channel. My wife can imagine me getting hooked on the sci-fi channel too, which is one of the reasons we don't have satellite or cable.

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